Have to say it, can’t start off without saying it, so, Happy New Year to anyone who listens. I feel if you ARE listening to me, you deserve a heck of a lot more than a wish. Seriously though, I do hope that anyone who reads me regularly or just happens to stumble upon me, understands that I really mean it when I say I wish you all you can handle; love, health, happiness, peace and unadulterated fun. I’m getting older and of course I want the standard happiness and peace like everyone else; but, I want to be a little juvenile as well. I want to be the grandma everyone apologizes for before you even meet her, the one who eats too many peeps, cusses at the most inappropriate times and plays with the grandkids in the rain, in the mud, or riding a roller coaster. A lot like my grandmother was; God rest her soul.
Is it possible to venture back to years gone by and try to remember goals left unachieved in a dusty notebook? Not the business goals most of us had to plan out every year for our boss’s perusal, not serious goals. I’m thinking more of the fun ones that may have been forgotten, but may still hold a place in our heart. I have to believe it is possible. You may have to break them down into categories of: capable to physically complete, legal and if there is still some meaning in it for you. I may have to take this up as a project for myself. Great, now I have a place to start.
Do you think it’s possible to go forward in the current climate of paranoia and Covid? I do; however, we have to get back to reality and stop politicizing everything. Trump really messed with the left and they flipped their collective minds. Listen, I’m not going there, however, I will say that I had two vaccines, due to my health, I was going to get a booster after the New Year, but watch out for the monkey wrench flying at our proverbial heads. I came home January 2nd from a wonderful time near Tahoe with friends. Put away 1/2 of the indoor decorations and then woke up sick as a dog. Really. Covid put me down for a solid two days and then four to five days after that I felt like I had a head cold. Way too much time on my hands. I’m going to be freed from isolation tomorrow. This thing is almost over. Stop allowing the media to frighten you, listen to physicians you respect, not government figureheads. We will get through it, we are at the tail end, see that light? That’s the end of this tunnel. I’m not going to tell you what to think or do; it is up to you. All I will say is, think rationally. Question. Don’t just accept what your told.
Do you think it’s possible to forgive yourself for mistakes made ages before this moment? Do you think it’s possible to forgive others who hurt you? To move past the hurt feelings and make peace with yourself? The people you need to forgive don’t even have to know about it. I believe it’s possible, I don’t think it will be simple by any means. My feeling is that forgiving yourself will be the most difficult. Forgiving something you did or said, depending on how long you have carried it with you or how heavy it weighs on your heart, may take a very long time and a lot of serious work. This is possible; but, it is not simple by any stretch of the imagination. I plan to start work on this sooner rather than later. Not sure how much time we have, tackling the important things first, seems the best idea.
Is it possible to start taking care of yourself, without neglecting everyone else and yet, really enjoy it without the guilt? I don’t even think there is time for that. How in the world can you take care of your family, pets, house and still have time to carve out some time for yourself? This is going to be another toughie for me. It’s not that I don’t do things for myself, it’s more that I have to do things around everyone else; their schedules, their needs. Here’s an example, if I want to skip dinner, have a bowl of cereal and a glass of wine, I can’t. My one son is a gym rat and he and his dad are food health nuts, so my, let’s say less than healthy meals on the fly, aren’t well received by those two. I want to fly by the seat of my pants. I want to skip dinner, or have dinner in the bathtub or have wine and cheese for dinner, I want to take a bath and skip dinner. Sit outside by the pool with a cocktail or a diet coke and listen to music for a few hours. Is it possible? Yes, but, I’ll have to let you know if my family freaks out or embraces me trying to just be an older version of myself.
Sometimes I think I would be better living on a small ranch alone with lots of animals and about three dogs. I don’t like being told I can’t have anymore dogs; just let me love a few more animals, we have the space. I want a beautiful view of the sky, I have found I need that. I could work all day around the ranch, my family can come visit anytime they want, but they could not criticize or tell me how to do things. Hmm, doesn’t that sound great? I think I need to make that picture come true in some form. I think it might be my turn.